Damn!…why so long?
You see: these days I pray constantly for the SMOD to appear in the sky.
From The London Daily Mail, Corey Charlton reporting, we learn:
An Irish man claims cone-headed aliens who abducted him while walking home from the pub have informed him the world will end in 850 years when an asteroid ‘the size of Munster’ [BOB: Not Herman] hits Earth.
Gerry Battles, a retired carpenter from County Limerick [BOB: There once was an alien from Nantucket….], said the creatures had ‘beautiful ginormous eyes’ and spoke to him via telepathy [BOB: That’s soooo 1970’s – how advanced can these guys really be?].
I’ll say one thing for these aliens: they know how to pick their Battles.
More!…
The 61-year-old told The Limerick Post he was wandering home from the pub [BOB: Surprise, surprise] on December 26, 2001, when he saw a white surgical light [that] transported him onto a spaceship, the Irish Mirror reported [BOB: I saw White Surgical Light open for Flock Of Seagulls in the 1980’s].
Let that be a warning to you youngins: Guinness abuse can lead to brain damage – I know because I’m a victim [I used to drink Black & Tans because I’m, you know, White and raaaaacism is, therefore, heretowith, in my DNA].
Even more!…
Denying he has any history of mental illness [BOB: Of course not – he’s just acting like a normal Irishman, as far as I can see], Mr Battles claimed the alien told him an asteroid the size of Munster [BOB: Not the cheese] originating from the ’35th Quadrant’ would destroy Earth in 850 years’ time [BOB: SMOD!…SMOD! – wherefore art thou, SMOD!].
He said the alien told him: ‘We are four million light years more advanced than you are. We have been observing you for Millennia.
‘You must use the force. Be one with the force. Harness the force.’
Well…that’s exactly what Sanders and Rodham want to do, so I guess this proves my theory that Leftism is alien.
I wish Mr. Battles well in his future, er, battles with Reality, as do I with Hillaria and Bolshevik Bernie and all their supporters [Trump and some of his gang, as well].
